Present Insanity and Future Plans..!

This past year has been a whirlwind in my life. God has taken me down a path I never would have expected. I am loving school but overwhelmed by it at the same time. This is definitely a time of learning for me and a time in which I have to prioritize what I do and how much time I spend doing it. I know I am way behind on so many things and I feel as if I’m neglecting my friends and for that I am sorry but I can only do so much with the little time I have available.

Part of my insanity came as a result of tripling up on my classes for awhile. One of the classes I took was on Marriage and Family which was very insightful in helping me prepare for my future (and interestingly enough was part of my schedule before I even knew I was getting married). One of my classes was on the Prophets of the Old Testament which was insightful and challenging at the same time. My other classes were Communication Concepts which was interesting and Christian Counseling which was a blast. The purpose behind taking so many classes was so I could have 5 weeks off in August after the wedding.

One thing I am super excited about besides the whole wedding thing… is the trip we are planning after the wedding… it’s not for the reasons most of you may be thinking right now..! In August I get the opportunity to take Matthew to Argentina with me and introduce him to my other world. Also, we are planning on doing an informal ceremony there so that I can celebrate my marriage with my friends and “family” in Argentina. We are combining our honey moon with this vision trip and spending a full month in Argentina.

Part of the process of Matthew being accepted as a Career missionary with Converge includes a trip to Argentina. This will allow us as a couple to seek God’s direction for our futures and allow Matthew to experience the culture and see the ministry I was doing in Catamarca for four years. This trip is a crucial first step. Please be praying for God’s guidance and that He will show us what ministry He has prepared for us. Also, pray for God’s timing in this whole process and wisdom in knowing what steps to take along the way.

The Proposal Story..!

The story you have all been waiting for… some more patiently than others J

In order to share the details of how Matthew proposed to me I have to give you some background information. Matthew’s 31^st birthday was on January 31^st and he made me promise that I would not do anything to celebrate his birthday. He did not even want a cake let alone a party.

Towards the beginning of January my sister called me one day to tell me that I should plan a get together for Matthew around his birthday time as an excuse for the family to meet his mother. I was reluctant to ask Matthew since he was so adamant about not wanting to do anything. He agreed to just having the family come over for dinner as long as I would not make a cake. Of course I convinced him by promising to make him lasagna for dinner.

(Little did I know that Matthew in reality had talked to my sister and told her to plant the idea in my head. He wanted to propose and wanted to make it memorable for me… including lots of pictures..!)

So, here I am planning Matthew a party (that wasn’t for his birthday of course) and he started inviting some of his friends… he loved spending time with people that are important to him so he wanted those closest to him to be at the party. Of course at this point I decided that the party was indeed going to be a birthday party. I then went back and told my sister to bring desert… knowing that she loved to make cakes… after all.. I only promised not to make him a cake myself… not that my sister wouldn’t make him a cake.

The day of the party arrived, January 29^th, and I excited drove home from class in Portland. I was smart enough to make the lasagna ahead of time and was able to shower and relax before people started arriving. Before my sister showed up, Matthew came up to me and said that he got away with not having a cake for his birthday… little did he know Kim was bringing the cake..!

She arrived and first thing she did was show me his birthday cake which I told her to hide because he didn’t know about it. Unfortunately, he noticed the cake and came up to harass me about it afterward she went to hide it.

It was a lot of fun just sitting around and visiting people throughout dinner and watching our friends and family getting to know one another. Then came the time for the cake… my sister put the cake on the table and we all surrounded it like you normally would for a birthday party. I was standing next to Matthew and Shane and lifted the box from his birthday cake and was surprised to see a different cake under the box.

Matthew had my sister make a cake that said, “Will you Marry Me” on it… with camera’s flashing I turned and gave Matthew a hug. I saw Shane had a box in his hand but I was too focused on Matthew to stop and listen to what he had to say. Matthew of course got down on one knee and for the first time told me that he loved me (Side note: He told me that he wouldn’t tell me he loved me until the day he proposed) and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me… and asked if I would marry him..! Of course I said YES… and the rest is history… or better yet… still in the future.

Shane wanted to ask me to be his step-mother but had to wait patiently to do so as I was too focused on his father to pay much attention..! But aftewards he did ask me and of course I was honored to be asked..!

I am engaged to be married... who would have expected that to happen..?

It's a crazy good road that God has me on..!

Of course everyone wants to know if I expected it or not... and although I was surprised that night about all the details and planning that went into this special event... I was not surprised that he proposed... I knew that the only thing he would want for his birthday was me..! This is a birthday he will never forget... good thing it's his "Golden Birthday" and should be celebrated in a special way. I love you Matthew.. and I'm excited for the adventure God is going to bring us on in the years to come..!

Christmas with the Family..!

Matthew and I spent the Holidays together visiting with friends and family. This was my first experience of having to go back and forth between houses celebrating with both families. We made it work and enjoyed every minute of our time together.

Matthew was a big hit among the children like always… I love the fact that my nieces and nephews love him to death and have accepted his son Shane into the family.

We wanted to make this Christmas extra special for Shane..!

Jimmy & Karen and the Family

Kim & Dan and the Girls

Matthew, Shane, and Me

Jeremy & Maria and the Family

All of the Children... There are 13 in all now..!

Matthew winning over the youngest of the family..!

God's Plans are Bigger and Better than my own..!

When I made a decision to go into career missions I laid down my desire to get married down at the throne of Christ. I knew that taking this path would make it very hard to meet a guy and get married. My focus for the past 8 years has been on serving God completely with my life. I was content where God had me and looked forward to my future ministry in Argentina. My life was completely full watching my nieces, studying at Multnomah and doing building up a support team for my ministry in Argentina.

It was in the midst of this stage of my life that God brought a man into my life. I still am amazed at how He brought it all together. I was looking up people from my past on facebook one day and ran across Matthew’s brother. Who is Matthew you may be asking… well... he is a guy I dated in Junior High. I had tried to find Matthew multiple times throughout the years but his name never came up. But on this particular day I found him and sent him a message; soon after we started talking on facebook and decided to get together to catch up. Of course being as I was I invited him to come visit me while I was working. J I didn’t realize that this lunch date would change my life.

Matthew and I hit it off that very first day; so much so that my first reaction was to run in fear. Remember it had been over 8 years since I even thought about dating a guy and here was a guy that had many of the qualities I was looking for: a love for God, a servant’s heart, a desire for missions, a passion for people, a love for his family, complete honesty and so much more. The more time I spent with him the more I liked him and found myself drawn to him. From the very beginning he encouraged me in my desire to return to Argentina and often prayed for me whenever I had to speak in front of a group. By the time he asked permission to actively pursue me I was already a goner..!

Matthew, Shane and I on our first outting to Snoqualmie Falls

Matthew didn't realize my love for Snoqualmie Falls until later on... but this is the place I always go to spend time alone with God and get direction for my future... Crazy enough it is also where Matthew likes to go :)

All Dressed up for a wedding..!

Of course the road was not an easy one. Poor Matthew had to put up with my wavering emotions. My fears came up constantly as I tried to understand what God was doing in my life. I had finally came to terms that I was going to be a single missionary overseas and I didn’t know what to do with a husband and a son with those plans.

During this time of wavering emotions I went on two separate trips. My first trip was to Florida for training and a time of encouragement. I left for the trip thinking I would most likely come home and break things off with Matthew. But God had something else in store for me. Through conversations with various people, including my boss, I came home with a peace that I was right where God wanted me to be. God was in control of the future and He would work things out for me. I came home with the realization that even if God changed my plans in regards to missions in Argentina that is okay because God is God and I have to obey wherever He leads me. But I also came home with peace that I could have both Matthew and Argentina. I didn’t have to choose between the two but trust God and follow Him one step at a time.

The whole team of missionaries who came together for a week..!

I was able to go a little crazy as I worked through the changes God was bringing in my life... no one thought I would really run through the fountain but man was it fun.. I also got to see an aligator.. I was in heaven for a couple days..!

Of course I also tooks lots of time to pray and think as well as share my ministry at a local church. God was really speaking to me on this trip..!

My second trip was to Palm Springs where I spent three days completely alone with God. This trip came after a breakdown as I once again struggled with the changes in my life. I was overwhelmed with life in general; I had to make some decisions in regards to school, was losing my job, and fearful of the future. I suppose one thing I should mention is that because of my past I had a lot of difficulty trusting men. I went to Palm Springs seeking God’s direction for my future; especially in regards to my relationship with Matthew. This getaway was just what I needed… I was able to take a walk every morning enjoying the beauty of God’s creation and singing praise to God. I was able to spend the afternoon studying God’s Word outside; including the new Bible study I had just started on “Discerning the voice of God”. I spent the evenings relaxing inside the condo praying and seeking God.

One night in particular I remember praying out to God and asking Him if I could trust Matthew with my heart and my future. It was after that prayer that I opened my Bible to the book of Psalm and read Psalm 19-20. Wow, God spoke directly to my prayer request… here I crying out to God and asking Him to help me trust Matthew and I came away realizing that I had to put my trust in God. I serve a God who loves me and knows the plans He has for me. I serve a God who is worthy of my praise and trust. I came home from Palm Springs refreshed and ready to trust God and this new path He was leading me down.

Studying the Word outside by the pool..!

I felt like I was in Argentina in the midst of a valley..!

Of course by the end of the trip I was ready to come home..!

Lessons I am learning... and a Prayer Request..!

A couple weeks ago I prayed that God would revive in me my passion for His Word… not that I didn’t study and didn’t love it but I wanted to wake up with the necessity to read His Word and to have that same passion last throughout the whole day. I wanted to truly live on the Word and have it be the only thing that helped me to survive the day. That was a pretty powerful prayer and God has definitely answered it in my life.

I’m amazed at what He has done in these past couple weeks to shake up my life. It gets easy to fall into the routine of daily life. It is easy to have a plan and be working towards it. My plan is to finish up school and get my support raised so that I can return to Argentina by next fall but what if God has so much more for me. What if my plans aren’t big enough? God has been at work in my life there is no doubt about that. I am still in shock over last weekend and the opportunity He gave me to speak at the annual meeting (read my next post for more details). But that is only the beginning of what God is doing in me.

These are the passages God is using to touch me during this time:

Josh 1:7-9 – “Be strong and very courageous. Be careful to obey all the law my servant Moses gave you; do not turn from it to the right or to the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful. Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, for the LORD your God will be with you wherever you go."

- God asks us to meditate on His Word and obey it. It is when we spend time in the Word that we become prosperous and successful. He will guide our steps and because of that we do not have to fear the future. This is a major lesson that God is trying to teach me. It was reinforces again at church as we studied about Spiritual health and one of the characteristics being peace (Phil 4:6-7). Lord, give me peace during this time as I seek Your Word and obey You..!

Josh 1:16 - "Whatever you have commanded us we will do, and wherever you send us we will go.

- This is my desire… to obey where God leads me and go where He sends me. I can’t imagine living my life doing anything other than serve Him.

Josh 3:5 - Joshua told the people, "Consecrate yourselves, for tomorrow the LORD will do amazing things among you."

- Have you consecrated yourself before God? Are you expecting amazing things from Him? One of Pastor John’s favorite quotes right now is, “Anticipate God”. Lord, open my eyes to the amazing things you are going to do among us..!

Josh 5:14 - Then Joshua fell facedown to the ground in reverence, and asked him, "What message does my Lord have for his servant?"

- My desire is to be able to do as Joshua did… to constantly humble myself before God and ask Him what He wants to teach me. What area in my life needs to be molded into His image? What areas do I need to change so I can display godly character traits? I know I am so far from perfect so daily I should be seeking His face and what He has for me.

On a side note, last night my Argentine father, Hector Canizo passed away from a heart attack in the middle of the church service. It shook my world and reminded me how short life is and how we need to be always be fulfilling our mission here on earth to preach the name of Christ wherever we go. He passed away doing what he loved, leading others to the throne of God in worship. Please be praying as I mourn his loss from so far away. Also, pray for his family in Argentina; his son Pablo and two daughters Vicky and Lucy. Lucy’s birthday is on Tuesday and for the past couple years she has not been walking with the Lord. I don’t know how she is going to deal with this but my prayer is that it draws her back to God. I so wish I could be there to support and encourage them and grieve with them. To be honest I think it is going to hit me hard when I return to Catamarca and he is not there. Right now I just want the peace that passes all understanding for everyone who loved Hector as much as I did..!

All Glory to God..!

I was amazed at God’s goodness this weekend. He is so good to me and all I can do is praise Him..! You may be wondering what was so special about this particular weekend..! Let me tell you but first I need to back up a week ago. J

A week ago I introduced myself to Steve Welling through an email. He is the district executive minister of Converge Northwest. Basically he is the guy in “charge of” the conference churches here in the Northwest J I knew they were having an annual meeting and wanted to know if I could show up and maybe set up a table and meet some pastors or leaders to share my ministry in Argentina with.

On Tuesday I went out to Lake Retreat to meet him and was encouraged to hear that he wanted to support me in this process of raising up a team of supporters. Not only would I be able to set up a table, but he wanted me to speak in front of the group on Friday evening. For those of you who know me well..YES I WAS VERY NERVOUS..!

But what an incredible opportunity it was. God gave me the exact words I needed to share a little about my ministry in Catamarca. To share what God was doing in the lives of the youth and how I got to be a part of it. Steve encouraged the churches to support me so that I can be fully-funded through the churches here in the Northwest.

Do you know how amazing it is to have the support and encouragement of the leader? Even Jerry Sheveland mentioned me a couple of times in his message. It was humbling to have these men of God speak on my behalf. I give all the glory to God; not only for the opportunity I had to share at the annual meeting but especially for the ministry He has called me to.

I am excited to see what happens through the contacts I made this past weekend. I’m excited to have the support of the leadership. Most of all… I’m excited to serve God with my life. Please continue to pray on my behalf.

Watching God Provide..!

This is a time of waiting upon the Lord and watching how He provides in amazing ways. I’m always surprised at who He touches to provide for the work in Argentina. Often times, I make my lists of people who I think will support this ministry but often times my own plans fall through. God uses the unexpected people and does so in His own timing.

This time of waiting can become discouraging but I am learning to trust in God and wait upon Him a little more each time I go through it. I started looking for God’s provision in the little things. One of the times I was discouraged, I received an envelope from 2005 when I was raising support. Someone after years of holding onto my support letter sent me $5. It was not the amount that mattered to me, but the fact that God was showing me that He was faithful and would provide for my every need; whether it be financially or the encouragement to be faithful to the calling He has placed on my life.

That is the most important part of this whole process. It is God’s ministry in Argentina, I am just the one He has called to participate in the work. And because it is His ministry, He will provide the way. As I take walks, often times I find a coin on the street. I pick it up and am reminded that it is “In God we Trust” and I need to trust God. In this time of waiting, I can trust in God’s faithfulness. That is the choice I am making.

I am so grateful for the friends and family that God has surrounded me with. I am grateful for family of believers who has supported me throughout the years through prayers, encouragement, financial gifts and even challenging me along the way.

Thank you to those who are continuing to support me. I’m excited to see that some have already returned their slips. Many more have told me they are praying about how much they are going to send in. Others have told me they are praying for my ministry. Each of you plays an important part in the work God is doing in Argentina. Thank you so much and may God continue to bless your lives and ministries here in the States!